Monthly Archives: December 2018

2018 Lego Advent Calendar: Day Four

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The new trailer for Captain Marvel was released and it looks like typical whiz-bang Marvel fun. While watching it, an idea hit me. And now I will write a quick pitch to Disney:

Dear Disney,

Please fold Santa Claus into the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Legally, it shouldn’t be a problem since Santa is in the public domain. His powers of flight, engineering, super strength (assumed) and speed fit perfectly with the existing Marvel roster.

Plus, you can add new powers that are never really explained or have zero rules, like whatever the hell the Scarlet Witch can do, or Captain Marvel’s energy beams. (Can she just shoot energy? Does she have a limited number of energy blasts? Does it hurt? Do the beams taste like cherry Slurpees? Is there a muscle she flexes to do that? Is that muscle in the calves?)

Santa can have such vague, nebulous powers — like a glowing blue light that…does stuff. Also, he should have a magic glowing snowball and high-tech goggles for seeing ghosts.

A big budget Santa Claus action movie would be wonderful. With your special effects and flashy visuals it’ll be fun! And make it funny, like Thor: Ragnarok. And colorful, like Thor: Ragnarok. And…just remake Thor: Ragnarok but with Santa Claus.

Who should play the winter wizard himself? Russell Crowe, John Goodman or Daniel Day Lewis. Or me. Your choice.

There is a new Santa Claus movie on NetFlix right now called The Santa Chronicles, starring Kurt Russell. I love Kurt Ruseell but the movie is bad. Don’t look at that for inspiration. But I do like Santa’s coat in that movie. And his big gloves.

Thank you for reading this pitch. I can get started on this right away. I look forward to working with you and making Santa Claus: Snowfall a reality! I’ll send over plot details in my weekly Wednesday pitch letter.

Have a great Tuesday!

Love Aways,
Dan Bergstein

I’ll let you know if they write me back. Ok. Now let’s Lego! Today we find… Continue reading →

2018 Lego Advent Calendar: Day Three

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Some say “Baby It’s Cold Outside” should be banned because it promotes dangerous, aggressive male behavior towards women.

Some say the song is a classic and banning the song is taking things too far.

Where do I land on the “Baby It’s Cold Ouutside” debate?

I hate that song. Ban it, but not for the social issues. Ban it because it’s a terrible song. Throw a goat at a piano and you’d get better music. And lyrically it sounds as though it were written by a budget-version of Dr. Seuss named Mr. Deuss.

This isn’t the first time I discussed the song, and it won’t be the last. I mentioned it here only because everyone is talking about it now and I feel the need to remind the world that the song is terrible for a wide variety of reasons and not just for the #MeToo implications.

Let’s Lego!

Today I was gifted with… Continue reading →

2018 Lego Advent Calendar: Day One

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Welcome to the 2018 Lego Advent Calendar!

Every December I countdown to Christmas with the help of the Lego Advent Calendar.

This is my 9th toy calendar! If you’re bored and want something Christmas-y to read to pass the time, dig down deep into all 8 previous years of the Advent fun. It’s a journey as intricate as HBO’s The Wire, but with even more characters.

Year One
Year Two
Year Three – The bad time.
Year Four
Year Five
Year Six
Year Seven – Playmobil a’hoy!
Year Eight

This year, I went with the classic Lego City Advent Calendar. You might be able to still buy one, but don’t get ripped off. These should only cost between $20 – $25. And even that is pretty steep for what you’re actually getting (roughly $10 worth of Lego pieces).

As before, my amazing girlfriend used wrapping paper to cleverly disguise the box art — which too often reveals EVERYTHING in the box. I can still see the included playmat, which looks activity-themed.

I don’t know what to expect. Cops and Criminals? Naked Santa? Nothing but 24 days of clear pieces? (I love clear pieces more than my own family.)

Let’s rip this holiday season open!

Behind the first door we find… Continue reading →