Not to brag, but the picture to the right is of my famous Dan’s Dessert Disc for Your Mouth. It looked better than it tasted. If you want to make you own, watch my instructional video, and check your blood sugar.

On to Day 4 of the calendar. So far, I’m enjoying the hell out of this year’s countdown. Crooks? Cops? Weapons? What more could you want?!

Alas, if the previous year is any indication, not all days will be outstanding. For every unforgettable Naked Shower Santa last year, there was a forgettable Lego Couch…which I literally forgot about until I reread the blogs.

Now I’m waiting for the crappy items of 2011 to reveal themselves.

Today’s item isn’t “crappy” nor is it crappy or CRAPPY. But I’m not jigging.

Read on to find out why.

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I made another unnecessary trip to the Lego Store. Had to. The world I am creating needs its own Lego mat and walls. The calendar comes with a printed cardboard mat, featuring a snow scene, but the pieces slide off too easily. I need a Lego mat. I could use the green mat I got last year, but then the Goat family will have no floor.

I’ve been asked if the Goats will make an appearance this year, and the answer is yes, but not yet. More on that later.

Right now I’m focusing on the 2011 Lego World. This burgeoning town needs a name, and that name is: Barbaria.

My girlfriend and I drove 100 miles round trip to the nearest Lego Store just so I could pick the right bricks needed to create the town of Barbaria.

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We have a winner! Nancy G. answered all questions correctly and was selected using a random number generator. Congrats Nancy! Hope you enjoy the calendar as much as I will.

If you didn’t win, you are horrible and should feel bad about life. But you can still buy the Lego calendar and experience the fun along with Nancy and me this December. And I may even invite some guest bloggers to help me out this advent season. More on that later.

Here are the correct answers to the questions:

1. On the final list of Lego items, what item did I rank sixth overall?
Cynthia

2. What is Sword Boy’s full name?
Sword Boy Goat

3. The Christmas character Tootles has a catchphrase. What is the catchphrase and which celebrity do I want to play Tootles in the movie?
“Yee-haw! Let’s eat some biscuits!” and Tootles will be voiced by Andy Richter.

4. What does the Dairy Elf have instead of arms?
Tentacles (Also accepted “Moldy Spaghetti” because my art skills are lacking.)

5. Sword Boy stood on the werewolf. Why did he do this?
He’s crying out for attention

6. What two items does Thaddeus (probably) keep in his briefcase?
Storm data and very tiny storms. (Would have also accepted “germs and molecules of air.”)

7. What name appeared third on Santa’s nice list?
Billthew

8. What did Sword Boy turn into after using a magical mystery item?
Ducks

9. Beneath the Christmas tree in my room last year, a certain celebrity was dressed as Santa. Who is the celebrity?
Tom Hanks

10. What superhero does Cat Girl turn into?
Hidden Dragon, the Samurai Girl.

Thanks for playing!

The trees are still green and the air is still warm, so what better time to have a Christmas contest?

I’m giving away one brand new 2011 Lego Advent Calendar, and you could be the lucky winner!

Last year I opened my very first Lego Advent Calendar and wrote about each day’s item. (Click here to witness the birth of fun.) It was a glorious time and I had so much fun with the box of happiness that this year I’m buying two calendars: One for me and one for (possibly) you.

There was some debate this year if I was going to buy the standard Lego City Advent Calendar, or the new fancy Star Wars Lego Calendar. I’m sticking with the City set because the Star Wars set is double the price of the standard set and looks weak. Besides Santa Yoda, the rest of the items seem kind of…eh.

I much prefer the goofy and silly Lego City items, especially when the items are average, everyday things like sausage and extra sausage. Because I will be opening the Lego City set, that’s also the set I’m giving away. Sorry, Star Wars fans.

The contest is being held now because the Lego Advent Calendars are becoming more and more popular and there’s a very real chance that they will sell out by November. Plus, with shipping and whatnot, I want to make sure the winner receives the item before December so they can stare at the box every day with the same maddening anticipation that I feel. Actually, I hide the box from my eyes to avoid possible spoilers depicted in the box art, and I advise the winner to do the same.

To enter the contest, you must take the following Laser Farm pop quiz and score a 100%.

All answers can be found somewhere on this very webzone. Some are easy to find, some will take more digging. Most questions, but not all, pertain to last year’s Lego Advent Calendar blog posts. There are specific answers to the questions. Only those who answer all questions correctly will be officially entered to win. A random winner will be chosen from the correct entries next Tuesday.

Send your answers to LaserFarmContest@gmail.com

Questions:

1. On the final list of Lego items, what item did I rank sixth overall?

2. What is Sword Boy’s full name?

3. The Christmas character Tootles has a catchphrase. What is the catchphrase and which celebrity do I want to play Tootles in the movie?

4. What does the Dairy Elf have instead of arms?

5. Sword Boy stood on the werewolf. Why did he do this?

6. What two items does Thaddeus (probably) keep in his briefcase?

7. What name appeared third on Santa’s nice list?

8. What did Sword Boy turn into after using a magical mystery item?

9. Beneath the Christmas tree in my room last year, a certain celebrity was dressed as Santa. Who is the celebrity?

10. What superhero does Cat Girl turn into?

The contest is open to anyone living in the contiguous United States. (Apologies to the citizens of Hawaii, Alaska, and Neptune.) The contest ends next Monday, September 12th at midnight (EST). The random winner will be notified via email. The winner will have 24 hours to reply to the notification and send me their address, or else I’m picking a new winner. Stay alert.

The prize will be sent directly to the winner from an online retailer.

If you are under the age of 18, please ask your parents for permission before entering.

Only one entry per person will be accepted.

This contest is not sponsored by or affiliated with any company or organization.

Good luck!

Two days. That’s it. Two perforated cardboard doors to tear open. Two Lego prizes to find. And then I will be without Lego until next December. I assume Advent Calendars end on the 24th day because the gift of the 25th day is Jesus and Love. Call me a heathen, but I’d prefer more Legos, or a Lego Jesus, than intangible feelings of spirituality and faith. Don’t mind me. I’m just pissed that there’s nothing to open on Christmas Day.

Today’s item is the Christmasiest item of the lot. It’s not Mrs. Claus in a bathtub, though that would be a splendid gift for tomorrow. Instead, it’s a…

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Christmas is literally right around the corner. (I named the spider in the hallway “Christmas.”) Yesterday’s Lego Item wasn’t spectacular but it’s a necessary part of the Christmas Train that seems to be popping out of the calendar. So I’m glad it’s there, even if I secretly wished for a Lego Sea Serpent.

Today’s item isn’t the train engine. The Lego Company knew I would be expecting an engine. A train needs an engine, right? Wrong. So very, very wrong.

Read on to find out what is providing the locomotion for this locomotive.

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