Blogging Twilight: Viper Edition is Available Now

Posted on April 4, 2022 by Dan Bergstein

Team Jacob? Team Edward? Team Emmett? Need help deciding?

Blogging Twilight is now available as an ebook!

All the blogs, all the murmurs, all the face-touching in one place!

Blogging Twilight: Viper Edition collects every one of my Twilight Blogs. From the first book, to the last “book.” It’s all here. Plus, it includes reviews for all the movies and extra goodies. Plus all the illustrations! PLUS A NEW INTRODUCTION! Everyone loves a new introduction!

Blogging Twilight: Viper Edition is more than 700 pages! That’s the most pages any book as ever been! Probably!

Order Your Copy Today!

It’s all here: Quil, Marcus, Emmett, jetpacking werewolves, outdoor spaghetti, Dan’s Thinking Lake, and more jokes about baby-dating than any ebook on the market. Probably!

Blogging Twilight began in 2009, back when Twitter was used to brag about your breakfast instead of destroying the U.S. socio-political climate. It was a weird time. Vampires were hot. Chuck Norris memes were hilarious. Gas cost a nickel. A new sound called “Rock & Roll” was sweeping the nation. . .

Now you can relive those glory days with Blogging Twilight: Viper Edition. Did you read the blogs back when you where in high school? Get ready to feel old! THAT WAS MORE THAN TEN YEARS AGO!

But the jokes hold up. The pain and torment have stood the test of time. You can still witness a grown man go slowly insane as he crawls through each and every Twilight book.

The entirety of Blogging Twilight has been transformed into a single bolt of lightning that lives inside your phone or tablet. (That’s what an ebook is, no?)Buy it. Share it. Use it to deflect evil spells. I’m just glad I can finally shove the whole thing into one, easy-to-find place.

I hope you enjoy this massive hunk of megabytes.

So excited!

You are my life now!

I will shovel your driveway cheap!

Posted on February 15, 2022 by Dan Bergstein

Alien Dentist

Posted on February 6, 2022 by Dan Bergstein

Under Pressure

Posted on January 30, 2022 by Dan Bergstein

(click to enlarge)

Complete 2019 Advent Drawing List

Posted on December 27, 2019 by Dan Bergstein

While I didn’t open the Lego Advent calendar, this year I counted down the days until Christmas with help from my girlfriend. Each day, she provided a new drawing prompt for me to sink my artistic teeth into. While I doubt the results are what she expected, we’re happy with how it turned out. Here’s the full list with the prompts. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Day 24: Wish

Continue reading →

Where Does Marvel Go From Here?

Posted on May 13, 2019 by Dan Bergstein

2018 Lego Advent Calendar: Day Nine

Posted on December 9, 2018 by Dan Bergstein

Sometimes you need to make your own fun. I picked up this wind-up toy at a craft store when it was on sale for $2. Honestly, even at two bucks I feel slightly ripped off, but if you want a wind-up toy you can paint, beggars cannot be choosers.

The set includes three tiny tubs of paint, and not nearly enough colors to decorate this toy as depicted on the back of the package.

How am I supposed to make all those colors? Red plus gold does NOT make flesh tone.

The good news is I always have extra paint because I’m living my best life.

The better news is that I ditched the acrylic paints and spray-painted this guy pink and metallic silver.

It’s my crowning achievement of the year. I should win the Pulitzer Prize for Santa Painting. (Please vote for me!)

Though hard to tell from the photos, the wind-up toy looks incredible. The silvery metallic screams “Robot!” and the hints of pink whisper, “Cosmic elf.” It’s the type of object you’d buy at an antique store at the center of the moon.

And the wind-up mechanism works rather well for a junky toy.