Blogging Twilight: Viper Edition is Available Now

Team Jacob? Team Edward? Team Emmett? Need help deciding?

Blogging Twilight is now available as an ebook!

Blogging Twilight: Viper Edition

All the blogs, all the murmurs, all the face-touching in one place!

Blogging Twilight: Viper Edition collects every one of my Twilight Blogs. From the first book, to the last “book.” It’s all here. Plus, it includes reviews for all the movies and extra goodies. Plus all the illustrations! PLUS A NEW INTRODUCTION! Everyone loves a new introduction!

Blogging Twilight: Viper Edition is more than 700 pages! That’s the most pages any book as ever been! Probably!

Order Your Copy Today!

It’s all here: Quil, Marcus, Emmett, jetpacking werewolves, outdoor spaghetti, Dan’s Thinking Lake, and more jokes about baby-dating than any ebook on the market. Probably!

Blogging Twilight began in 2009, back when Twitter was used to brag about your breakfast instead of destroying the U.S. socio-political climate. It was a weird time. Vampires were hot. Chuck Norris memes were hilarious. Gas cost a nickel. A new sound called “Rock & Roll” was sweeping the nation. . .

Now you can relive those glory days with Blogging Twilight: Viper Edition. Did you read the blogs back when you where in high school? Get ready to feel old! THAT WAS MORE THAN TEN YEARS AGO!

But the jokes hold up. The pain and torment have stood the test of time. You can still witness a grown man go slowly insane as he crawls through each and every Twilight book.

The entirety of Blogging Twilight has been transformed into a single bolt of lightning that lives inside your phone or tablet. (That’s what an ebook is, no?)Buy it. Share it. Use it to deflect evil spells. I’m just glad I can finally shove the whole thing into one, easy-to-find place.

I hope you enjoy this massive hunk of megabytes.

So excited!

You are my life now!

Everything You Need to Know About the Dark Tower Series

The upcoming movie The Dark Tower hopes to bring Stephen King’s complex universe to an even wider audience. But before you head to the theaters, here are a few important things newbies should know about the books.

  • The books were written in the past tense.
  • There are no magical snowmen in the books. None. So if there is a magical snowman in the movie, know that the movie is deviating heavily from the source material.
  • When stacked on top of each other, the books are not as tall as a normal person. It’s maybe two feet, at best and depending on the editions.
  • The Canadian versions of the book cost a little more than the American versions.
  • One of the books is named The Wolves of the Calla and none of the books are named Snow What: Snow-Fellow Pete in the Minotaur’s Maze.
  • None of the books rhyme, so it’s very hard to sing them out loud at a talent show. Also it will take several hours to sing them out loud so give yourself time.
  • Continue reading