Let’s forget yesterday happened. We can move on from the horrible item behind December 4th’s door and look towards the future.
Right now, before opening the door, today’s item has the potential to be anything. It could be a Lego trampoline. It could be a Lego duck. It could be Lego Ben Franklin. There are no limits.
Think positive and maybe today’s item will be glorious. Think positive. Think positive. Think… Continue reading
Today’s item is unbelievable!
It’s existence is proof that we all died and live in heaven. It’s almost too good, like the first cookie you’ve ever eaten, or what it must feel like to be Tom Hanks. You are about to witness greatness that cannot be measured.
Prepare accordingly, take a breath, and click.
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“Because toys come to life at night, and if we don’t, the Lego people will die.” – That’s a pretty convincing argument for opening all the cardboard doors right away. If you are 8 years old, and need an excuse to open every door of your Lego Calendar, go with the one above. You’ll be ruining the entire holiday season, but you will get your Lego faster.
At the risk of generating too much hype, today’s item is the very best Lego item I’ve opened this December.
It’s…
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We’re off to a good start.
The Lego Friends Advent Calendar has spat out one figure and she’s wearing a winter sweater, so at least this set already feels Christmas-y. What will day 2 bring forth? Read on to find out!
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Opening the Lego Advent Calendar is among the greatest holiday traditions, and belongs right up there with tree decorating, cooking baking, and listening to awful music. To those new to the Lego Advent Calendar, click here to experience the past two years of fun.
The Lego Advent Calendar is box of cardboard doors that countdown to Christmas Eve, and behind each day’s door is a Lego item. Sometimes you get something stupid like a Lego bed, but sometime (well, just once really) you get a Naked Shower Santa Claus. And when you get a Naked Shower Santa Claus, all is right in the world.
But things are different this year. Very different. While 2010’s Lego Calendar was perhaps the greatest thing humans have ever created (thanks to Naked Show Santa, jetpack werewolf, and the wide variety of goodies), last year’s calendar was a little lackluster as multiple days were wasted building Lego walls for the kinda-cool-but-not-really Lego Police Station.
With that in mind, looking at box for the 2012 Lego City Advent Calendar, I was somewhat disappointed. First, Lego is now showing waaaay too much on the box. The fun of these calendars is never knowing what you’ll get. If the box were just decorated with a big red question mark, I would have bought it instantly. Instead, I looked at the box, saw that this year’s theme was a fire department, and shrugged. Sure, Lego Fire is cool, and having a Lego Fire Dept. would be pretty badass, but this year I want something a bit more unusual. A bit more fun. A bit worthier of 1,000-word blog posts.
So I left the 2012 Lego City Advent Calendar on the shelf.
WAIT! Don’t leave. There is indeed a Lego Advent Calendar to open! I promise.
You may assume this means I’m opening the Lego Star Wars Advent Calendar. Sadly, the Star Wars calendars never seem that interesting and are grossly overpriced. Stores near me are selling them for upwards of $50! That’s ridiculous. There are about $20 worth of Lego in these boxes, and I would pay an extra ten for the Star Wars branding, but $30 is my limit. Besides, once again the box shows off too many items. There are more surprises to be had in a bag of generic Chex Mix than in the Lego Star Wars Advent Calendar.
No City Calendar. No Star Wars Calendar.
What else is there?
Pick up and the phone and start calling the cops. Things are about to get downright creepy.
Ladies and Gentlemen, this year I will be opening the….
We’re just days away from December 1st and the opening of the 2012 Lego Advent Calendar. Though I was nervous it wouldn’t arrive in time, the Lego calendar I ordered was at my doorstep today. We’re good to go.
However, things will be different this year. It’ll be fun and we’ll all learn a lot.
Here’s to hoping there’s another Naked Shower Santa hiding behind the cardboard door.
See you back here in a few days.
It will be six months before I open the 2012 Lego Advent Calendar. And that’s almost a year away! Luckily, during the non-holiday months Lego is offering up items that rival the mighty Advent Calendar in nearly every way. While the Advent Calendar is filled with surprises and mystery, the Lego items below are filled with angel’s magic and genie blood. That’s how great they are.
Lego just released a series of Monster Fighter toys. These sets Lego-ize the classic movie monsters like Dracula. But who would want stupid, dumb Dracula when you can have….
Name: Air Worm
Powers: Flight; crawls into ears and noses to lay eggs; silent
Weaknesses: Lava; magnets; sharpshooters; air fish; wind
Origin: These creature use a type of literal animal magnetism to float through the air.
Rules: They don’t mean to harm humans, but sadly dozens of people are killed each year by the air worm, and another 66,000 are grossed out.
Description: Tiny flying snake.
Last Seen: They thrive in parks and grassy areas and they just love, love, love a longitude of 85-degrees.
Want more Monsters? Click here!
The Rules
By Dan Bergstein
Ninja beats pirate. Pirate beats ghost.
Ghost beats zombie. Zombie beats most.
Werewolf beats vampire. Vamp beats Imp.
Imp beats fiend. Fiend beats wimp.
Wizard beats cyrborg. Cyborg surely beats troll.
Troll beats goblin. Goblin eats a hermit’s soul.
Hermit beats child. Child beats wagon.
Wagon beats moon snake. Moon snake beats dragon.
Dragon beats hydra. Hydra beats sailor.
Sailor beats teacher. Teacher beats tailor.
Tailor beats sun worm. Sun worm beats clown.
Clown beats robo-squid. Robo-squid beats town.
Town fights jackals. Town will win.
Town fights mummies. Town won’t fight again.
Zookeeper beats hell hound. Hell hound beats giant.
Giant beats accountant. Accountant beats client.
Client beats frog. Frog beats himself.
Knight beats Big Foot. Big Foot beats elf.
Elf beats pixie. Pixie beats specter.
Specter beats sea hag. Sea hag beats Hector.
Hector beats serpent. Serpent beats rat.
Rat beats Grandma. Grandma beats cat.
Lava beats demon. Demon beats warlock.
Warlock beats dinosaur. Dino beats Spock.
Spock beats Lando. Lando beats Qui-Gon.
Qui-Gon beats Jar-Jar. Jar-Jar beats none.
Rock beats scissors. Scissors beat paper.
Paper beats insect. Insect beats vapor.
Wood Woman beats Tree Man. Tree Man beats the dark.
The dark kills spider-fish. Spider-fish beats shark.
You beat me. I beat a dentist.
The dentist beats the barber. The barber is menaced.
These are the rules, and never forget.
Now hand over your money and place your bet.
