The amount of Christmas shopping I’ve done is equal to the number of times I spelled “psychiatry” correctly on my first try. So this weekend is all about buying presents. Ideally, I would know what to buy, or at least make a list of who needs presents, but instead I’m just going to the areas of the world where stores exist and hopefully find the exact right presents for the exact right amount of people.

Wish me luck. Also, send me some coffee, because that would be delightful.

Speaking of delightful, today’s Lego Friends item is every flavor of cute.

Click on…

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When days are as wretched as this one, please take a moment to appreciate everything you have and remind yourself that while evil happens, wonderful things always outnumber the awfulness. Always. It’s a fact.

On the scorecard of Good vs. Evil, Good is winning by billions of points.

My thoughts are with the families who suffered a tragic loss today in Connecticut. I can’t hug them all or change what happened, though I wish I could. If there is anything I can do, let me know.

This is the most solemn intro to a Lego Calendar blog that I’ve ever written, and hopefully will ever write. I almost didn’t post this because looking at the news, a Lego Calendar seems even more insignificant than it usually does.

But I’m posting it anyway to remind myself about that Good vs. Evil scorecard.

Click on to see today’s item.

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I’m smiling. I’m happy. I’m glad that I have this calendar and I’m thankful for every item in its cardboard belly. Yesterday I had the wrong attitude. I was a Grumpy Gavin.

Today, I’m Positive Poseidon!

Whatever I get will be delightful and will capture my imagination like seeing The Empire Strikes Back for the first time.

Put on some Christmas music! It’s with hands shaking joyously that I open the cardboard door and find…
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Screw you, Lego. I know I shouldn’t be complaining, but after a hellish day of work and commutes and cold dinners and headaches and no jetpacks, I come home eager to open the Lego Advent Calendar and unwind.

And then I opened today’s door. Now I’m angry.

I’m not even going to make you click to the next page. Here’s today item.

It’s a stupid dog. That’s it. One tiny dog.

The dog doesn’t have a bone, or toy. There is no sausage. There is no food bowl or leash.

Just a dog.

I’m naming him Helicopter because a stupid, tiny dog needs a cool name. That name is the only thing stopping me from throwing the dog out and pouting with my arms crossed.

The dog itself isn’t that bad, but only the devil and math teachers would think this little dog is enough “treasure” for an entire day.

WHAT THE HELL?!

OK. OK. Helicopter is kinda adorable. And he looks like a bit of a scoundrel. I love him.

Day 12 Rating: 0.2 out of 10 (Points deducted because I’m angry.)

Tomorrow better be fantastic!

In three years, I never missed a Lego Advent Calendar Day, and so it’s with a heavy heart that I present today’s item a few minutes AFTER midnight.

I apologize.

If you hate me and never read another word I write, I will understand.

But if you find it in your heart to forgive me, please continue reading to find out what was behind today’s (or yesteday’s) door.

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If Lego were smart, they’d put me in charge of Advent Calendars. At the risk of bragging, I could bring a great deal of creativity and wonderment to the otherwise ho-hum calendars of the past two years.

The person currently in charge of calendars is doing an adequate job, but they’re not bringing their A-game. With the near limitless potential of Lego, a calendar should offer more than just typical Lego prizes. It should make you cry.

My calendars would be filled with oddities and fascinating bricky objects. Each day would make the child (or grown adult) gasp with holiday cheer. They would tell their friends, “You gotta see this Lego Calendar, Pete! It’s off the hinge!”

(I assume most people have a friend name Pete, and I’m trying to get “Off the hinge” to be a cool phrase.)

I’m hesitant to list what types of themes and items I would put in a Dan Lego Advent Calendar, because Lego could too-easily steal my mind-thoughts. But perhaps one day my dreams of making calendars will become a reality. If not at Lego, then perhaps somewhere else.

Anyway, let’s open the tenth door of the Lego Friends Advent Calendar and see what shade of ordinary dwells beyond the flap of cardboard.
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There’s not much to build. That’s been my overall feeling about the 2012 Lego Friends Advent Calendar. Every day’s item is nearly complete when you open the cardboard door. The reason for this could be…

1. The calendar is giving up crappy pieces that do not need to be constructed.

2. Lego feels that the Friends line should be less about building, because they (horribly) think girls don’t like to build things. So the Friends toys are pretty much just Polly Pocket but with removable heads.

3. I’m overthinking this.

Today’s item is….
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Happy Hanukkah! I label myself half-Jewish (my dad is 102-percent Jewish) but I don’t remember ever celebrating Hanukkah correctly. Usually my family would just light all eight candles whenever it was convenient (meaning we weren’t doing Christmas things), and if it actually occurred during the days of Hanukkah…well, that was a bonus.

As for Hanukkah presents, I never received eight separate gifts. I got a few presents that were labeled “From Santa” and few that were from “Hanukkah Charlie.” (Yes, we called him Hanukkah Charlie because Hanukkah can be spelled with a CH, and no, I’m not spelling Hanukkah with a CH today because I’m not really sure how.)

My fondest Hanukkah memory is getting an Empire Strikes Back digital watch. You probably stopped reading this out of jealousy. I know I would.

The point is: I received the same amount of presents that everyone else got. So when I told school friends that I get both Hanukkah and Christmas presents, they would vomit with envy, not knowing that my present allotment was no higher than a typical kid’s holiday loot.

I’m rambling. For the sake of fun, let’s say that today’s Lego Calendar item is a Hanukkah Present!

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I lost my iPod today. It’s a bright red iPod Nano, the square kind with the touch screen.

I had it with me on the bus home tonight, but now it’s gone. If you see it, give it back…and don’t judge my taste in music! The Trans-Siberian Orchestra is a hell of band and what they lack in meaningful lyrics and subtlety, they make up for with brutal Christmas soundscapes!!! Stop judging!

The point is, tonight sucks. Today’s item better be great. If it’s a new iPod, that would be super.
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It’s St. Nicholas Day, and you know what that means? I’m hoping you know what that means, because I don’t.

Yesterday’s item was a pretty great Baby Robot Snowgirl.

If today’s item is s-wordy, I wouldn’t be too upset. The calendar can’t offer up greatness everyday. Like they said in The Incredibles, “If everyone had superpowers, that means no one does.” (I’m paraphrasing, and it may not have been from The Incredibles. And that quote doesn’t even really apply to this calendar. Whatever. It’s late.)

Click to discover today’s item!

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