I’m not sure why the restaurant chain Arby’s has a Twitter account. Moreover, why would anyone wish to follow such a Twitter feed? I enjoy Arby’s food but that’s the extant of my interest in the company. Are there die hard Arby’s fans in the world itching for more content, dying to know Arby’s opinions on trending topics? Perhaps. After staring at the Arby’s Twitter feed for a few moments (hours), I had an epiphany.

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Warning: If you continue reading, you will die from confusion.

Note: I am not a philosopher or astrophysicist, and it stands to reason that the concept described below has been fully explored in more elegant terms by people much smarter than I.

Still with me? Here is why I can’t sleep tonight:

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