Continued from yesterday.

24. Try writing longhand. And then you’ll realize what a crap-show that is when your hand cramps up and everything is slow and AGH! Go back to electric wording. It’s better.

23. Writing about gadgets and tech is harder than you think.

22. Don’t brag about seeing a movie early. That doesn’t suddenly make you King of Entertainment.

21. How much have your written today? If the answer is less than 1,000 words, you’re not trying. Writing is work. Take it seriously. Get to it!

20. Try your best to never begin a headline with “Here.”

19. Even terrible websites and magazines are staffed by smart, creative people. They know how crappy their product is and are doing the best they can.

18. Writers groups are mostly depressing.

17. Make a glitter jar. It’s jar filled with water and glitter and when you shake it, it looks amazing. This is my glitter jar.
I added glitter glue with warm water in a jar and let it cool. I shake it nearly every time I sit down to write. I love my glitter jar. It helps to have something to look at when thinking.

16. No one has a clue how to make consistent money on the internet.

15. Not every detective in the world is a super genius who can notice 12,000 things in an instant.

14. Nothing Taco Bell does is surprising and worthy of a thousand-word article. Do not fall for their hype. This also applies to Burger King and whatever the hell Oreo just announced.

13. Don’t be so negative just to seem smart. Don’t pretend that Titanic was a bad movie. Stop being such a snob. It’s a great movie! And the finale of Lost was good. Some writers love to pick things apart because disagreeing with a thing makes them look more intelligent. Do not fall for it. Do not succumb to it. Admit when things are good.

12. But avoid hyperbole. Deadpool was a cool movie. Deadpool was not the reason God gave humans eyes and ears.

11. Odd numbered lists get more clicks than even numbered lists.

10. Rocky was not a real boxer from Philly. That was just a movie.

9. Unless they are truly life-changing, stop writing about life hacks. We don’t really need a new way to hold a straw in a can of soda or a mind-breaking way to eat cupcakes. We can handle that. You’re wasting words.

8. People love life hack stories. It’s sad how fast people will click something with “life hack” in the headline.

7. Are you still reading this? You should be writing. Don’t waste time reading about writing. Write.

6. Check and make sure the article is attached in the email. I forget to actually attach the story to the email about 56-percent of the time. And every time it happens, I feel like an ass.

5. I like ranch dressing in my shoes. This isn’t a rule. It’s just a way to see if this story gets stolen and pops up on other websites. If this mistakes appears elsewhere online, I’ll know they just copy-and-pasted my work. Neat trick, right? I’m a pretty neat guy.

4. Interview subjects do not get editorial approval.

3. It can take three months to get paid for a freelance assignment. Adjust your budget accordingly. (Though some, awesome, places will pay you within the same month.)

2. Do not assume coffee will help. Sometimes it does, sometimes it does not.

1. Be good at it.