I’m in the midst of a writing project that’s both fun and nearly impossible to keep organized in a single Google Doc or Excel page. I was having a hard time with it yesterday and then, while using my computer, iPad, phone and a bolt of lightning I keep in a box, I realized the best way out of this is with old-fashioned, non-WiFi, non-electrical tools. Sometimes you need to unplug because human brains are still adapting to this thing called computers. I went out and got a used bulletin board at the thrift store for $2.

I added a Big Foot sticker because that’s where my life path has taken me.

The board is too big, I know. But I think it’ll help. I’ve been staring at it, wondering from whence it came. Was this hanging in a school at one time, alerting snotty third graders to the joys of “Why We Should Recycle!” or “Whales” or “Slut Shaming: Double Standards in the Patriarchy”? I’m sure there’s a secret history to this framed slab of cork, and damn if it’s all I can think about now. If you recognize this bulletin board, please let me know its origin story.

Seven days into the calendar and I’m waiting for the next mini-figure to pop out and say, “Jesus wasn’t even born in December!” (I assume the next character is going to be a teenager who just got home from one semester of college and now knows all information.)

Today we get…

A Dumb Sled!

It’s dumb. I can’t be too hard on it, though. It sure looks sleddy. It achieves the desired effect, and to criticize it for that is like being angry at The Justice League movie for not including Spider-Man. This sled had a job to do — to look like a sled. And it does.

Mrs. Claus jumped on, saying, “Last one down the hill is a rotten candy cane…which, by the way, is the type of candy cane I got as a child because back then candy canes were made of leftover pig intestines hardened by the sun and covered in raisins!”

But, as you could probably tell from a few photos ago, the parts of this sled are far greater than the whole, for in that sled are hidden two distinct hockey sticks!

So now I’m changing this day. It’s not a sled. It’s Two Hockey Sticks (plus a bunch of other pieces)!

By using one of the extra pieces from a previous day as a puck, you can make a very nice hockey scene.

Mrs. Claus body checked Melvin. And when Melvin fell, she laughed and said, “Concussions make your hair curly!”

Day 7 Rating: 2.3 out of 5 (Points added for the hockey sticks.)

See you tomorrow!

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