Today’s item is both fantastic and troubling. On one hand, it involves something I’ve been after since December 1st. On the other hand, it’s not really what I expected.

I’m being cryptic here because I like to believe some of you enjoy the buildup of tension. I also believe that if I absorb enough static electricity with my flannel-lined coat, I can summon a bolt of lightning, and this lightning will be my friend and we will have fun adventures together. This will further be explained in my forthcoming science textbook, “Dan Befriends Jo-Jo the Bolt of Lightning.” (Publishers, hit me up on Facebook for the deets!)

So what possible Lego prize could fill me with mixed emotions? Find out below.

It’s Sausage…Dog?

The dog is great, even if his body is one solid piece of plastic without any leg movement. He’s better than Keyboard Cat, because Lego Dog has two very tiny eyes, and he has sausage(s). The illustration shows the dog enjoying one sausage. The package contained an extra sausage, but I may save that for Cynthia the Girl Who May Not Come With Sausage At All. I just don’t know what to do.

There’s still hope that Cynthia will arrive equipped with her own sausage, but it’s hard to believe Lego would put three sausages in their Advent Calendar. Sausages aren’t swords, after all. (I want that sentence on my tombstone, please.) I’m sure most recipients of the Lego Advent Calendar would be pleased with just these two sausages. Am I greedy if I want another sausage for Cynthia?

If Cynthia doesn’t have her own sausage, then the box lied to me. If the cover for Jane Eyre showed a guy riding a motorcycle with a sidecar, and there was a machine gun in that sidecar, you’d be pissed once you got to the end of the novel and never witnessed a machine-gun-motorcycle scene. Sure, I could give Cynthia the dog’s sausage, but that’s like writing the machine-gun scene into the margins of Jane Eyre. It’s fun, but feels wrong, and the librarian is going to yell again.

What should I do? I don’t know, guys. I just don’t know.

Oh, and the dog came with his own food box, and Sword Boy is riding the dog because he’s crying out for attention. Cat Girl is ignoring him because that’s how Cat Girl rolls. Don’t hate the player…

Day 8 Rating: ?.7 out of 4 (I need to think this one through some more.)

If you need me, I’ll be at my Thinking Lake. I’m giving the sausages to Robot Snowman until I figure this out. It seems like the right thing to do.