Name: Ape With Electric Whip (a.k.a. Mr. Honkers)

Powers: Intelligence of a first grader armed with an electrical whip.

Weaknesses: Easily distracted, doesn’t react well to lava, despises loud noises.

Origin: Unknown, but it would probably make a hell of a movie.

Rules: Don’t go near him. Don’t swim if he’s standing by the pool. Avoid eye contact. Avoid whip contact.

Last Seen: Buying batteries at Radio Shack.