{"id":1061,"date":"2011-07-22T14:54:07","date_gmt":"2011-07-22T18:54:07","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.laserfarm.com\/?p=1061"},"modified":"2011-07-22T15:10:40","modified_gmt":"2011-07-22T19:10:40","slug":"monster-of-the-day-43-80-year-old-anime-fan","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.laserfarm.com\/?p=1061","title":{"rendered":"Monster of the Day #43: 80-year-old Anime Fan"},"content":{"rendered":"

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Name<\/strong>: 80-year-old Anime Fan<\/p>\n

Real Name:<\/strong> Fred<\/p>\n

Powers<\/strong>: He has the power to wear up to 17 belts at one time. He also has the power to creep out anyone. Anyone! <\/p>\n

Weaknesses<\/strong>: Mall security. Stairs. Anything that happens after 7 o’clock at night. People who “just don’t get it.” <\/p>\n

Origin<\/strong>: At first everyone thought he was some sort of Benjamin Button man\/child, but it turns out he just really digs Anime culture, particularly the erotic statues of young women kicking. <\/p>\n

Rules<\/strong>: His bedroom is scary. <\/p>\n

Description<\/strong>: He tends to make “hnnnn” noises without knowing it. Still not as scary as a Middle-Aged Twilight Fan<\/a>. <\/p>\n

Last Seen:<\/strong> Using his Social Security check to buy fingerless gloves and ridiculous boots that feature 14 buckles and 10 zippers. <\/p>\n