Tag Archives: Tips

This Blog Is Engaging and Perfect

“The ideal reading length for a blog post is seven minutes. That translates to roughly 1,600 words.” – Content writing advice offered by marketing experts.

Seven minutes? That makes sense. I haven’t timed my eyeballs or my brain, but spending seven minutes on a blog seems right. If you want an engaging blog, it should take seven minutes to read. However, here we are at the mere 70-word mark and, whoa boy, I’m not sure I can make it to the full 1,600 with this little blog. Right now, it’s more a greeting card than a blog. And we all know how non-impactful (impactless?) and non-viral (healthy?) a greeting card is. I don’t want this to be a willowy and weak greeting card. This is a powerful and mighty blog! This needs to be something big, something substantial, something you can print out and nail to the wall with a railroad spike!
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Everything You Need to Know About the Dark Tower Series

The upcoming movie The Dark Tower hopes to bring Stephen King’s complex universe to an even wider audience. But before you head to the theaters, here are a few important things newbies should know about the books.

  • The books were written in the past tense.
  • There are no magical snowmen in the books. None. So if there is a magical snowman in the movie, know that the movie is deviating heavily from the source material.
  • When stacked on top of each other, the books are not as tall as a normal person. It’s maybe two feet, at best and depending on the editions.
  • The Canadian versions of the book cost a little more than the American versions.
  • One of the books is named The Wolves of the Calla and none of the books are named Snow What: Snow-Fellow Pete in the Minotaur’s Maze.
  • None of the books rhyme, so it’s very hard to sing them out loud at a talent show. Also it will take several hours to sing them out loud so give yourself time.
  • Continue reading Everything You Need to Know About the Dark Tower Series


Dollar Store Art!

If you’ve been spying on my Instagram photos, you know I enjoy taking art from the dollar store and then making it more artful.

The first step is finding great dollar store art. While writing up this list of 100 Best Dollar Store Items for Maxim, I learned that the dollar store had more to offer than just scary meats and pregnancy tests. They also sold statues!

Not every dollar store us created (or stocked) equally. My girlfriend and I drove about 40 miles and visited about five or six dollar stores to find just the right stuff. I like the animal busts. These nicknacks are wonderfully weird even if you don’t modify them with colors. Well worth a buck each.

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Dan Reviews Lady Razors

It was time to shave off my beard and this was the perfect opportunity to test out lady razors. I have never used a lady razor before, but I always wondered what the difference is between a men’s razor and a women’s razor, besides the color. Both are multi-blade razors. Both have magical strips of moisturizer. Both are featured in awful, awful commercials. So is there a difference? Let’s find out! Continue reading Dan Reviews Lady Razors

Dan’s Tips for Teens #388

Our intestines don’t digest themselves. But what if you eat another person’s intestines? It might give your intestines an appetite for intestines. Then one night your intestines will say, “Hey, maybe it won’t be so bad if I digested a little bit of myself.” And that’s a dangerous highway to take, my friends.

Be smart. Don’t eat human (or monkey) intestines.